02: What Is Filk, Plus Bonus Song Lyrics

I thought I'd have my first, non-introductory, post be something kind of fun. There are a lot of legacy bits and pieces of fandom that aren't being carried into modern fandom. This isn't usually due to a lack of interest. It is usually due to a lack of exposure. Filk is one of those niche items. When I went to a convention full of nerds and performed filk in their talent show; my co-performer and I had to educate the audience on what filk was before we sang.

What is filk? According to the Fanlore site, “Filk is a musical culture, genre, and community tied to science fiction/fantasy fandom. The genre has been active since the early 1950s, and played primarily since the mid-1970s.” Filk can be any style of music and about any geek oriented topic, including cats. Most filkers I know define filk as anything sung in a filk circle. A filk circle is like a drum circle with more guitars and fewer drums. The hippie ratio at some conventions might be similar.

Some filk uses the music of existing songs. Other filks are completely original. There are both serious and funny songs. There is also a tradition in filk for the music to become recursive. There are filks about filk and parody filks of other filks. This long history and internal culture can create a bit of a barrier for new filkers. I hope to help reduce that barrier some.

If you’ve ever heard the geek songs from the old Dr. Demento Show, like “Banned from Argo” or “Star Trekkin”, you’ve heard filk. Weird Al's 'Star Wars' songs are filk. Just don't say that to him. He refuses the label. These fun and funny songs have made me a listener of filk for as long as I’ve had a radio in my home. My discovery of the filk community happened through a now defunct local convention. I had left the gaming area late at night and heard singing. I followed the sound to a bunch of nerds in a side room belting out fun music. There is no skill required to participate in a filk sing. Just show up and have fun. You can sing or just listen. There’s even a song about off-key singing called “The Key of R.” There are also very skilled musicians. Some folks even manage to make filk their profession. Those pros do attend the same open sings as everyone else and just take their turn.

I don’t know how to read or write music, but I have always written poetry and I understand scansion. So, lyrics come pretty naturally to me. This means that my filks use other peoples’ tunes. Some of them are funny. Some are serious.

Cats are a very common topic in filk songs. I’m not a cat person at all, due to very dangerous allergies to the critters. I never thought I’d write a cat filk until I saw an internet meme with the line “I pet this kitty and boop its nose.” It was an incomplete song asking to be written. I posted it to a filker board to see if any of the cat people wanted it for themselves. After a couple weeks with no takers, I decided to finish the damned song. So, have a song about cat memes and shitty internet trolls.
"I Pet This Kitty" Parody Lyrics: lilalexei Original Music and Lyrics: Bernard J.P. Taupin/Dennis Lambert/Martin George Page/Peter F. Wolf (We Built This City) I pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose Pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose Say you don't own it or dominate its fate Say you just feed it putting meat on its plate Petting all the kittens, buried in the brood Too many runaways eating up the food Grumpy cat gets the traffic, surfing on the internet Don't you know the meme? I pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose I pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose Pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose Someone's always playing political ploys Watch out, they're full of lying political noise We just want to play here, neckbeards full of spite They call us ineffectual, try to cause a fight Grumpy cat gets the traffic, surfing on the internet Don't you know the meme? I pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose I pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose Pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose It's just another chat room On the same old site The trolls have got a choke hold, oh When they are just a blight Who bans the kitties from our homes and schools Who writes the taboos and apartment lease rules Looking for Grumpy cat, combing through the net Memes make us laugh when we just want a cat to pet (I'm singing out over that Gamer Gate blight on another gorgeous internet asylum and I'm seein' it teeming with inane trolling.) Don't you know the meme? (know the meme) (Here's your favorite internet chat room, on your favorite internet website, the site on the page, the site that rocks, the site that never stops.) Grumpy cat gets the traffic, surfing on the internet Don't you know the meme? I pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose I pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose Pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose Pet this kitty (oh) I pet this kitty and boop its nose Pet this kitty I pet this kitty and boop its nose (I pet, I pet this kitty) Pet this kitty (I pet, I pet this kitty) (I pet, I pet this kitty) Pet this kitty (I pet, I pet this kitty) (I pet, I pet this kitty) Pet this kitty (I pet, I pet this kitty) (I pet, I pet this kitty) Pet this kitty (I pet, I pet this kitty)