The Queek Files

We celebrated National Coming Out Day a few weeks ago and a version of this post is partially what inspired this blog. I’ll be expanding on some of the ideas from the Book of Faces post. That I am queer should come as zero surprise to all of you. The name of the blog... duh. Shit, I set off orbital gaydar. People have joked about me being obviously queer since I was a little girl shaving off Barbie's hair and having her kick GI Joe's ass. When the other little girls were going to school dressed as princesses, I went as a knight or Luke Skywalker. In my retail and food service days, complete strangers tried to fix me up with their “dyke cousin” or “granddaughter who likes girls.” My own acknowledgment of my orientation and gender expression has come in fits and starts. I've always struggled with social rules (yay, adult diagnosis with Asperger's). Everything/everyone has always had to fit in it's label and follow specific rules, otherwise I’m not completely sure ...

I've been a near lifelong Star Wars fan. The first film came out when I was really young. My mom tells me that Darth Vader made me cry. This changed with Empire Strikes Back. I fell in obsessive love. My birthday, leaf raking, and snow shoveling money was poured into Star Wars toys, comics, and books. I played Star Wars pretend, made Star Wars costumes for me and my dolls/stuffies.  This obsession literally never ended and was a huge source of mockery in middle and high school. There was even an awkward police encounter as an adult. (Black cloaked people in a park in the late 80s/early 90s were assumed to be Satanists, not costumed nerds. The officers declined our offer of grilled hotdogs.) My first convention costume was a version of ROTJ Luke Skywalker. I have custom made Jedi robes and my Star Wars collection is immense. Without duplicating, I can wear a different Star Wars t-shirt every day for close to two months. I still go to opening night of every new Star Wars film. ...

I thought I'd have my first, non-introductory, post be something kind of fun. There are a lot of legacy bits and pieces of fandom that aren't being carried into modern fandom. This isn't usually due to a lack of interest. It is usually due to a lack of exposure. Filk is one of those niche items. When I went to a convention full of nerds and performed filk in their talent show; my co-performer and I had to educate the audience on what filk was before we sang. What is filk? According to the Fanlore site, “Filk is a musical culture, genre, and community tied to science fiction/fantasy fandom. The genre has been active since the early 1950s, and played primarily since the mid-1970s.” Filk can be any style of music and about any geek oriented topic, including cats. Most filkers I know define filk as anything sung in a filk circle. A filk circle is like a drum circle with more guitars and fewer drums. The hippie ratio at some conventions might be similar. Some filk uses th...

I should probably introduce myself. I can’t assume that all of you already know me. Hi, my name is lilalexei. Not really, but that has been my internet handle or gamer tag since 1997. I'm a middle aged, queer, geek. What does that mean? For me it means a lot of things.  Before I dig into the queer or geek components, I want to address why I added my age group. I mention being middle aged because it factors strongly into both my queer and geek experiences. I’m GenX; that teeny Generation with a huge date spread that is trapped between the two 800 pound gorillas, the Boomers and Millennials. More specifically, I am just old enough to have seen Star Wars when it first opened. I am also young enough to have grown up playing video games. I also remember watching my own government ignore the AIDS crisis as the older queers around me died. By geek, I mean a lot more than the fact that I’m a fan of what is now called “pop culture.” I was absolutely the nerdy kid who was in the ‘g...